I am often shocked by the things people say. So when I colleague of mine approached me and talked about a social issue that is prevalent today, I didn’t expect her viewpoint to be completely 180° different than mine. I expected some commonality.
Not only was her viewpoint completely different than my own, but in my mind it was riddled with unjust conclusions and erroneous input of information. Sounds like a lot of our country‘s political differences doesn’t it?
As introspective as I am, this got me to thinking about the daughter I’m raising who struggles with me. Is the dialogue and the information that she’s processing coming to her through shocking emotions? In other words, is her perception of the truth so skewed that we’re on two different planets when we try to discuss things?
How can two people with very similar value systems have two completely different ways of processing information they see or hear? Further, if you have a child between the ages of 10 and 20, it is more likely that their perspective is opposite of yours then it is similar. How do you bridge the gap?
I have to have patience when I talk to her. I have to ask her what her perspective is or I can’t give her the truth as opposed to the lies she’s either heard or tells herself. I have to know what the information is before I can modify it. This takes a loving conversation between the two of us.
My last question is, if you have daughters or sons or friends where this type of thing is prevalent, I urge you to ask them to explain themselves because more often than not what happens is you find out you both want the same things and somewhere in the middle of the discontent you can learn respect for the others point of view.
Reba Nietert 