December 2018 – Reba Nietert

I always begin the new year with a reflection of what I learned a year prior. With that being said this has been a complete blast yet very emotionally draining year. My beloved “state of mind” home was sold this year, my son moved to Colorado, and I learned that Dallas would be my home for the next several years. Every year I make a picture book for all my children, like a sort of yearbook for them to look back on the good things we did over the past year. So, when they look back on their childhood and the mundane tasks they had to overcome, they realize there were a lot of blessings along the way.

The night before 2019 has pushed 2018 aside, I sit wondering if I should spend the next year focused on creating more happy moments for the children or if I should focus on building my independent small press company? Do I have a right to dream at this point, or should I postpone the season of my personal success so that I can give them more opportunities for their success? I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for 26+ years and I think I’ve paid my dues? So should I set goals and resolutions?

Here’s my mommy/businesswoman advice: we all have these questions. We all have that dialog that tells us we’re not doing enough for our kids, they won’t have a relationship with us if their childhood is not constantly happy, or we’re just not good parents. Give yourself a break! Kids will find our errors if we do everything right! You’re not perfect! Neither am I but after witnessing my grown kids tackle life I’m glad I’m not! In an effort to try to give my children everything I did not have I thought I had forgotten to give them what I did. I was wrong! My kids are happy independent adults making their way. They’re decent and honest. They don’t disparage other humans. They fight for the underdog. They both are faithful believers. How much more success is there?

Relax! Make your goals! Don’t be afraid to put yourself first sometimes because then when you do, that happiness will trickle down to those you love! You will teach your kids how to be a healthy happy adult! Find the right fit and balance for your own life!

Happy New Year! 🎊🎆🎈 May this year be all that you desire and bring reverence and respect from those you cherish!

The other day, I posted some witty banter about a declaration. My statement was designed to make people think about the word “pride.” You see sometimes I am prideful and sometimes I am not. When I get haughty and I believe that I deserve a certain something, that’s when pretty much everything in my life takes a drastic turn from relationships to successful income to you name it. In addition to my efforts in transparency, I wanted to publish the statement so that in the next few days when I am not feeling so humbled, I can peruse through my social media and remember to let go of that which I cannot control.

Sadly, all it did was make people feel I was sad or make people feel I was desperate. Neither of which is true. My post said something like this: “there is peace in knowing that in 100 years whatever I did will not matter.” I wasn’t trying to go dark. I’m certainly not a quitter. I’m certainly not somebody who wouldn’t try to make an impact on society. That’s just did my make up.

I wrote that statement as a testimony of the actualization an understanding that comes from their ability to see I have no control. Therefore, when I tried to over exceed and put wealth as a tagline to my speaking or writing books or promoting other authors or publishing other author books, I am reminded that I can only do what I can do. I may never be The best Publisher, the best writer, the best speaker and somehow that gave me a sense of peace. I stopped trying to do it to be the best and started trying to do things that I love to do. And somehow, releasing that need to make my mark gave me immense peace.

That might cause anxiety for somebody else but for me, as a self-proclaimed control freak, today anyway, I’m a little bit calmer. The impact I have on today is only for the legacy I will leave behind for those I already know. I will have no impact on their children’s children. Somehow, learning to be the best person I can be so that my dialogue with myself is joyful, confident, and ultimately peaceful. After all, isn’t that what all of us want?

Why do you care so much? What’s the worst that can happen? Learning when to speak and what to say is profoundly as important as knowing when to shut up and be quiet 🤐! Lol Learning this fundamental art can be the difference between life long-lasting relationships with the legacy you want to leave versus a life filled with angst and torment from feeling out of control. I write this today as much for anybody who reads it as well as for myself for reference I don’t later date when I will certainly need it!

Take care, Reba

#AmWriting #Publisher #Writeangst #SpreadSomeLove

Month: December 2018

Resolution or Goal!?

Why do we care so much!?