forwomen – Reba Nietert

While what’s sexy may be in the eyes of the beholder, we have to admit the 50-and-better years make it harder to feel like we’re as attractive as we ever were. Yes, I’m of that age, qualified to add my two cents worth, and I love to write about the subject.

First of all, I’m not talking about celebrity sexiness. I’m looking at sexiness in the real world: my neighbor who still hops on a motorcycle to feel the wind in her hair with her hubby who has none…the friend in yoga class whose skin glows and natural silver hair looks effortlessly chic, who astounds us at 70…the pickleball partner who rocks spandex at age 64, pumps iron and still works with the police…the artist who paints nudes and won’t hesitate to pose for same.

Do each of those, real women I know, share a common body shape, look or lifestyle? No. Some are married, one widowed, one without a current partner. While they define sexy to me, each of you might have a different type in mind. Yet high on the list of what most people say constitutes sexy is confidence.

Age usually breeds confidence. Hey, what an advantage! My own hubby says I’m sexier now than I was at any younger age. I think I see proof otherwise in old photos, yet he insists it’s true. And I have to admit, his smile lines and savvy make him sexier than ever—but let’s leave men’s aging to another post.

As my characters remark, we women have so much going on in our heads that can squelch or stoke sexiness. Many of us were brought up to suppress it at every age. Did your mom seem sexy? Our different cultures/upbringings surely influence what we perceive. One woman’s sexy is another’s dull…one’s daring or even promiscuous is another’s normal or playful. Some applauded this year’s Super Bowl halftime while others thought it went too far beyond what cheerleaders show us all year round. But back to non-celebrity mojo, here.

All that said, by this age we may have had children, empty nest, career, grief, illness, being a caregiver, whatever’s in your mix. It’s too easy for women to put ‘sexy’ on a back burner, thinking you’ll get back to it, then realize you’ve forgotten how to connect to it. Some crash into a midlife reawakening (I’ve heard much on that from readers of my first book). Some give up on being sexy along with giving up dating/marriage, saying it’s more trouble than it’s worth and that they’re content.

My conclusion is sexiness fits into each journey differently. And some women are so unconventional (meet the MC in my second book) that they may not immediately strike us as sexy. But just because one of us doesn’t see the sexy in another doesn’t mean someone isn’t telling her she’s sexier than ever. In the end, who are we to judge?

Find Nancy and her novels at:

https://www.facebook.com/nancy.lipetri

http://nancylonlakenorman.blogspot.com/

Parenting can often feel like an overwhelming task, especially when faced with the challenge of raising children who have experienced significant loss. As we navigate through the complexities of grief, therapy sessions have shed light on the importance of being accountable not just for our children’s well-being, but also for our own actions and examples. In this heartfelt journey, we explore the struggles of maintaining love and patience amidst sibling conflicts, and how teaching love after loss becomes our ultimate calling.

Body:

1. A New Sense of Accountability:

Therapy sessions have presented us with a unique opportunity to reflect on our experiences, as we are asked to complete homework assignments that encourage us to acknowledge and record our glad, sad, and mad moments throughout the week. This newfound accountability not only helps guide our discussions with the children, but also emphasizes the significance of setting positive role model examples for them. We realize that just getting through the day is not enough when our goal is to bring joy to children who have only known sadness.

2. Balancing Conflict and Love:

Sibling arguments and bickering can easily consume our attention, tempting us to respond with anger and immediate consequences. However, we understand that this does not effectively address the underlying need for love and connection. Teaching love after experiencing such profound loss becomes our primary focus. We are called upon by a higher power to heal and nurture, not just correct and discipline. This journey involves actively choosing patience and understanding, even when it feels difficult.

3. The Power of Patience:

Losing our patience is a common struggle faced by parents, particularly when dealing with the complexities of grief. The weight of the emotions we carry can sometimes make us feel overwhelmed, causing us to react impulsively rather than responding with love. However, we must remember that true healing and growth arise from patient and compassionate interactions. By prioritizing our children’s emotional well-being and fostering an environment of understanding, we can shape their resilience and show them the power of patience in the face of adversity.

4. Embracing Love as Our Journey:

Raising children through loss is not an easy path, but it is one that we have been called to embark upon. Our journey involves teaching love, compassion, and resilience, even in the face of immense sadness. By exemplifying these qualities, we provide our children with the tools they need to navigate their own grief and find healing. We discover that the most important lesson we can teach them is that love is not diminished by loss, but rather amplified through it.

Conclusion:

As we navigate the challenges of raising children who have experienced significant loss, we must remember that our ultimate calling is to teach them love and compassion. Through therapy sessions and self-reflection, we embrace accountability and recognize the importance of setting positive role model examples. By balancing conflict with love, practicing patience, and recognizing our journey as a path of healing and growth, we equip our children to face adversity with resilience and discover the boundless power of love.

In this journey, may love guide our actions, heal our wounds, and bring light to the lives of our precious children.

Tag: forwomen

Why don’t more women look sexy as they age?—by Nancy LiPetri

Embracing Love: A Journey of Raising Children Through Loss