This morning I was awakened by two adorable children of mine. The first said for the second time in two weeks, “I am sick.” Sure enough, a temperature quest proved her declaration. The second screamed, “Zeus (our predatory cat) has ANOTHER bunny!” of course I picked it up and saved it’s life with a lecture along the way of how I warned it earlier that week to stay hidden during the day. Regrettably, bunnies don’t listen well. Same little angel then proclaimed, “My phone is BROKEN AGAIN!” In the most annoying 13-year-old attitude she could muster she then responded to me saying, “Phones just don’t break!” with, “Mine did!” I sighed heavily. I plugged the phone into my charger, commanded she consider the phone worthless and figure out another way to contact friends and sat down for my first cup of coffee.
The phone rang. It was my husband. He was frustrated with the insurance company again and needed my help to find a document. He is the greatest man I will ever know, I should proceed with that. Sometimes his situation drives me nuts! When someone has an issue with health or choice or whatever, don’t you believe it is their responsibility to forge a path of correction? If so, how would one go about this? I find the most intricate arguments are when one or both partners believe that the other is overextending, taking for granted or just flat out not paying attention. Ah, such is the case with all relationships. Mine although nearly as perfect as one could be, is simply not perfect.
I find myself taking a back seat to the needs of those around me, and even though it’s a mother’s necessity (it’s written somewhere I am sure) it is not always an easy pill to swallow. In the words of my 12-year-old (the youngest sick one,) “It’s damn hard!”
Listen, I count my blessings, desperately try to find favor in God, and all the maternal commandments of a wife and mom, but every now and then, I would like to not have to worry about getting my hair done because a kid needs this, or cannot get my nails done because he needs that. When someone is learned enough to visualize the needs are being met for everyone and yet when the well has run dry, well, I wonder why they don’t see it’s a struggle and mom needs a break?
These are the times that are necessary to build love, trust, and companionship in others but it is also the necessary tool to be YOUR VOICE and USE YOUR WORDS to command the time and respect you deserve. You matter. Your feelings matter. It’s not selfish to make them matter to someone. After all, the people in your life are making their needs matter to you. I encourage you to tell your story.
My name is Rebecca and I do just that. I help people navigate through tough emotions and put words to those feelings. I can help you write your story one tiny black mark at a time.
For now take care of you. Then give me a ring….