Tag: rage

My Work

Chaos & Adversity Resides in the “Burbs”

Reba Nietert

Oh, what a glorious morning it’s been! Nothing like a dog launching itself onto your stomach to remind you you’re alive, right? Who needs an alarm clock when you’ve got a furry wrecking ball? Then, off I go to deliver blood—because what’s more exhilarating than starting your day with “that” little joy ride? Oh, and surprise! A bonus overdue bill that insurance *just didn’t feel like covering.* Ah, the thrill of adulting.

Next stop: Best Buy, where my $275-a-year warranty plan apparently only covers the privilege of being told, “Sorry, we can’t touch that because Mac is too fancy for us.” Cool, cool. No worries, I’ll call Mac support! Surely they’ll save the day. Spoiler alert: They didn’t. Their troubleshooting steps were so helpful that I still can’t remove “Find My Mac,” can’t ship it in, and oh, the nearest Mac store? Just a casual 80 miles away. Totally convenient.

Meanwhile, my inbox is blowing up with client emails. You know, because technology is supposed to make life easier—except when it doesn’t, and instead sets your soul on fire (just like my MacBook, which is now doubling as a space heater). I’ve got 10 minutes to get anything done before it overheats and turns into a toaster. And let’s not forget Scott, who’s juggling his own life while I’m over here like, “Hey, can you also help me not set my house on fire with this laptop?”

Speaking of fire hazards, I left the dogs home alone because clearly, today wasn’t chaotic enough. They’re probably redecorating the living room with teeth marks as we speak. Oh, and because I’m a genius, I decided to cook eggs on an empty stomach. Fast-forward 10 minutes, and I’m starring in my own one-person food poisoning drama. Salmonella for breakfast? Chef’s kiss.

And the best part? It’s not even 1 PM. Can’t wait to see what the rest of the day has in store. Maybe a meteor? Fingers crossed!

Wait though, another twist in the day of… Oh, the joys of modern technology, where your $3,500 “investment” from 2018 is now worth less than a decent dinner for two at a steakhouse. Let’s take a moment to appreciate your laptop’s midlife crisis: deciding to moonlight as a space heater while simultaneously developing an attitude problem with its spacebar and trackpad. It’s like it hit its rebellious teen years—five years late.

So, after nearly setting your lap on fire and enduring its refusal to play nice with your Apple ecosystem, you decide to take action. First stop: Best Buy, where your $270 warranty has aged like milk. “It’s been too long,” they say. Oh, you mean the “five years” since I bought this thing? My bad for thinking a warranty might actually, you know, “warrant”something.

Next up, the Apple Store. After an hour-long conversation with a guy who probably Googled your problem mid-call, you’re handed off to a salesperson with the charisma of a used car dealer. Their solution? Rip out your laptop’s guts, charge you $1,200, and offer no guarantees. Oh, and the cherry on top? That little smile when you mentioned erasing your data. Classic.

Back to Best Buy, where Jennifer is lovely (thank you, Jennifer), but the rest of the experience is like a corporate scavenger hunt. They can’t fix it because it’s “older”—a term that’s starting to feel personal at this point. Then, a helpful sales guy swoops in, dazzles you with AI talk, and shows you a shiny new Windows laptop. Great! Except when you look it up online, it’s $850, not the $1,100 he quoted. Oh, and your $3,500 MacBook? Worth $150 at Best Buy or a generous $200 if you’re willing to wait for Apple to mail you a check. What a deal.

So here you are, sitting with a glorified paperweight that doubles as a fire hazard, wondering if you should just sell a kidney to fund your new computer. Do you go without one? Well, considering your current laptop might spontaneously combust, it’s already halfway there. Maybe it’s time to embrace the “no-tech” lifestyle and start writing letters by candlelight. Or, you know, find a way to turn that space heater into a side hustle.

Reflection

A Glimpse of Resilience: Overcoming Violent Beatings from a Damaged Teen Mom

Reba Nietert

Copyright 2024 – Rebecca Nietert

I’ve shared moments from my past when life appeared blissful and uncomplicated. However, the elation I felt in those instances was soon shattered by the horrors of violence. This is my personal story, distinct from my mother’s, and it’s essential to remember that there are always two sides to every narrative. It wasn’t until later in life that I came to realize the undeniable inaccuracy of my own perspectives and the distorted lenses through which I viewed the world. My memories had been shaped by fabricated tales, constructed to avoid shouldering any responsibility for my actions during my youth. My mother, too, battled her own personal demons, frequently succumbing to their influence.

In reconsidering my past, I approach it with caution, understanding the need to carefully evaluate the validity of my own recollections. It is a vital lesson I have learned on my journey towards self-discovery and awareness. By acknowledging the complexity of our individual stories, we begin to comprehend the fragmented nature of truth.

My mother’s story and mine are intertwined, yet divergent. Through introspection, I now understand the necessity of appreciating her struggles, her mistakes, and the battles she fought silently. We are all imperfect beings molded by the circumstances that surround us. Recognizing this truth has allowed me to discern the flawed nature of my own perspectives and narratives.

A Childhood Marred by Turmoil:

Growing up in the shadow of an emotionally damaged teen mother was fraught with difficulties. As a young child, I endured physical abuse, experiencing frequent, violent beatings that left both physical and emotional scars. Most of what I recall was fits of what I call blood rage. An uncontrollable urge to control a situation that one feels pain or loss or unfairness. This immature reaction was the status quo. The consequences of that torment was the removal of any sense of security. Her unreasonable explosions at any given time robbed me of safety. A battle I continue to struggle with today. Eventually, the English language became an escape from this painful reality, offering solace through literature, poetry, and stories that transported me to worlds far removed from my own.

Seeking Understanding and Empathy:

As I navigated my teenage years, a desire to comprehend my mother’s emotional turmoil drove me to explore psychology and self-help books. Through extensive reading and introspection, I began understanding the impact of trauma and emotional instability on individuals. Writing provided me with a platform to communicate my discoveries, fostering empathy and understanding among peers, educators, and eventually, even with my mother.

Discovering Inner Strength:

While the beatings continued, I discovered my own reservoir of inner strength, often rebelling and thereby increasing the frequency. I heard words of love from her tough detached lips only when guilt had consumed her. To hear them I would suffer the brutal force of her rage. I would egg her on. That was my culpability in our dysfunctional dynamic.

Breaking the Cycle:

Armed with newfound self-awareness and a thirst for personal growth, I vowed to break the cycle of violence that had plagued my family for generations. Drawing inspiration from my mother’s strength in overcoming her emotional demons, I sought therapy and professional guidance to heal my own wounds. The English language provided a safe space to verbalize my pain, explore healing techniques, and share my journey of personal transformation.

Embracing Forgiveness and Empathy:

Unbeknownst to me, my ability to forgive and empathize played a pivotal role in my journey towards healing. Recognizing that my mother’s actions stemmed from her own unresolved trauma and emotional instability allowed me to see her not just as my abuser, but as a vulnerable human being. I penned heartfelt letters to my mother, expressing my understanding and offering forgiveness, fostering a path to reconciliation and healing.

Engaging in creative writing, I poured my emotions onto paper, forming a narrative that empowered me to rise above my circumstances. With my communication, skills, honed, it offered me the means to articulate my pain, frustration, and resilience, transforming my experiences into a tangible testament of my journey.

Conclusion:

My path of overcoming violent beatings inflicted by my emotionally damaged teen mother has been one of resilience, self-discovery, and forgiveness. My prayer is to transcend my painful experiences, heal through writing, and ultimately find empathy and understanding. I hope to inspire others who have faced similar challenges to tap into their inner resilience, embracing the power of forgiveness and self-growth, and finding solace in the healing power of words.

Please Note: when I say, beatings or abuse, I am specifically talking about bruises that are able to be seen, muscles that are torn, and bones that are broken. The last occurrence at the age of 14. However, with all that revealed, my mother and I became best friends because when 2 people choose healing & forgiving, change happens. I live in a glass house and will throw no stone.

amwriting, Inspiration, Uncategorized

The Power of Forgiveness: Healing from Missed Connection

Reba Nietert

Copyright 2018 – Rebecca Nietert

Life, with its unpredictable twists and turns, often leads us to cross paths with numerous individuals. Some become close friends, while others remain mere acquaintances. But what happens when the trajectory of these connections takes an unexpected turn, leaving us with regrets and unspoken words? Today, we reflect on the power of forgiveness and how it can help us heal from missed connections that we carry with us.

Body:

1. The Blessing of a Network:

Having an extensive network and knowing a multitude of people is often seen as a blessing. It opens doors, creates opportunities, and fosters a sense of belonging. However, amidst the constant movement and ever-changing landscapes, maintaining deep connections can be a challenge. Life’s circumstances, such as frequent relocations, can make it challenging to cultivate and sustain intimate friendships.

2. Reflecting on Missed Connections:

Sometimes, we are confronted with the reality of missed connections when someone we knew suddenly passes away. The weight of missed opportunities to reach out and reconnect floods our souls. We are left grappling with the guilt of not being present or extending a helping hand when it was needed the most. This experience serves as a poignant reminder of the fragility of life and the importance of cherishing our relationships.

3. The Alpha Male Paradox:

In our pursuit of connection, we often overlook those who appear strong and self-reliant. The alpha males or individuals who exude confidence and independence may give off the impression that they will always be okay. This assumption can lead us to neglect reaching out to them, not realizing that even the strongest among us may require support and empathy.

4. Embracing Forgiveness:

Forgiveness is not only a gift we offer others but also a powerful tool for our own healing. It is easier to forgive others when we understand that life’s challenges can hinder communication and connections. By extending forgiveness to ourselves for missed opportunities, we can release the burden of guilt and embrace the lessons learned.

5. A Path to Healing:

Forgiveness provides a path to healing and closure. Through forgiveness, we acknowledge our humanity and recognize that we cannot control every aspect of our lives. We learn to let go of regret, honoring the memories we shared while accepting that some connections were meant to be fleeting. By forgiving ourselves and others, we create space for growth and compassion.

6. Embracing the Present:

The experience of missed connections serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of being present in our relationships. It allows us to reevaluate our priorities and invest our time and energy in cultivating meaningful connections with those around us. By embracing the present moment, we can foster deeper connections and mitigate the regret of missed opportunities.

Conclusion:

Forgiveness holds the key to healing from missed connections that weigh heavily on our hearts. As we navigate through life’s network of relationships, let us remember to extend forgiveness not only to others but also to ourselves. Embrace the present, prioritize meaningful connections, and cherish the opportunity to create lasting bonds. For in forgiveness lies the power to find solace, acceptance, and ultimately, the freedom to forge deeper connections filled with love and understanding.

Inspiration

The Liberating Power of Forgiveness: Unburdening Your Soul

Reba Nietert

Copyright 2015 – Rebecca Nietert

In the intricate dance of human relationships, we inevitably encounter hurt, betrayal, and pain inflicted upon us by others. In these moments, forgiveness may appear elusive and counterintuitive, but it is precisely during such times that embracing forgiveness becomes a transformative act of self-liberation. This blog delves into the profound impact of forgiveness, revealing the healing power it holds for our own well-being and personal growth.

1. The Hidden Cost of Unforgiveness:

When we hold onto resentment, bitterness, and hatred towards those who have wronged us, we inadvertently shackle ourselves to the past, preventing our own growth and self-discovery. This burden weighs heavily on our hearts, hindering us from fully experiencing love, joy, and inner peace. By recognizing the true cost of holding onto un-forgiveness, we can begin to explore the path towards healing and release.

2. The Compassionate Act of Self-Forgiveness:

Forgiveness is not just a gift we give to others; it is a priceless act of self-compassion. By extending forgiveness to ourselves, we acknowledge our imperfections and allow space for growth and transformation. Embracing self-forgiveness empowers us to let go of self-blame, guilt, and shame, paving the way for self-acceptance and inner harmony.

3. Recognizing the Fallibility of Others:

It is essential to understand that the person who hurt us may not even be aware of the pain they have caused or have already found their own peace. Holding onto resentment only perpetuates our own suffering, while the one who wronged us may have moved on. By recognizing the fallibility of others, we can shift our focus towards our own healing and growth.

4. The Healing Journey of Confrontation:

Confronting those who have hurt us can be a powerful step in the forgiveness process. Through open and honest communication, we can gain clarity, understanding, and even find our own truth amidst the complex dynamics of conflict. Meeting somewhere in the middle, we can foster respect for both sides and pave the way for reconciliation and healing.

5. Embracing Forgiveness for Liberated Living:

As we embark on the journey of forgiveness, we liberate ourselves from the chains of resentment and pain. We reclaim our power and create space for joy, love, and personal growth. Forgiveness allows us to shed our emotional baggage and step into a future filled with possibilities and authentic happiness.

Conclusion:

Dear reader, forgiveness is not an act of weakness or an indulgence of the perpetrator. Instead, it is an act of self-empowerment, compassion, and liberation. By releasing the weight of grudges and resentments, we create space for healing and personal transformation. As you navigate the complex terrain of forgiveness, may you find solace, courage, and the strength to unburden your soul and embrace a future filled with love, joy, and inner peace.

Remember, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself—a choice to reclaim your happiness and rewrite the narrative of your own life. Let go, release, and discover the profound freedom that forgiveness offers.

Stay tuned for upcoming blog posts that explore further nuances of forgiveness and provide practical guidance on nurturing a forgiving heart.

Inspiration

By The Grace of God – Loves Journey

Reba Nietert

Copyright 2015 – Rebecca Nietert

This past week, the world was filled with stories that shook us to our core. One particular story shared by a Facebook friend left me with a heavy heart. They suggested that the devastating earthquake in Nepal was a result of a few ignorant individuals committing a horrific act. According to their belief, it was a punishment from God, affecting the entire region. But the God they spoke of is not the loving God I know.

The God I know is one of compassion and mercy. He is the one who rescues lives and brings justice without causing harm to the innocent. When I read that post, my response was not anger, but deep sadness. I couldn’t help but feel heartbroken that my friend might not know the same loving God that I do.

It made me ponder on a different scenario – if the woman who, in a fit of fearful rage, violently slapped and shouted profanities at her young son had Jesus standing directly behind her, would she have still acted that way? And if we were to witness this scene with Jesus present, would we put her actions on a pedestal as justified rage? Or would we recognize that Jesus, in his infinite love, would never condone such behavior?

The truth is, we live in a world where pain and anger often cloud our judgment. But amidst it all, I believe in finding solace in the unwavering love of God. A love that calls us to be kind, compassionate, and understanding. It reminds us that we have the power to choose a different path, to break the cycle of rage and hurt.

In these trying times, let us hold onto the belief that there is always room for redemption and forgiveness. Let us strive to be the embodiment of love, offering grace where it is needed most. For it is through our actions that we can truly reflect the loving God we know and share that love with others.

In this narrative of life, let us choose to be agents of compassion and understanding, bringing light to a world that often seems engulfed in darkness.

Inspiration

The Power of Forgiveness: Liberating Ourselves from Anger

Reba Nietert

Copyright 2014 – Rebecca Nietert

In life, we often find ourselves entangled in the web of unresolved anger, judging others without seeking understanding or clarity. These situations may strike a chord within us, reminding us of our own journey towards forgiveness. In this blog, we delve into the transformative power of forgiveness, offering insights and guidance to our general readers. By embracing forgiveness, we can unburden ourselves from the shackles of anger and pave the way for healing and personal growth.

1. Reflecting on Our Own Judgments:

When we find ourselves entangled in anger or judgment, it is crucial to take a step back and reflect on our own shortcomings. Recognize that we, too, have been guilty of judging others without understanding their perspective. By humbling ourselves in this manner, we open our hearts to the possibility of extending forgiveness to those who have wronged us.

2. Understanding the Nature of Prickly People:

Prickly individuals, who often project a sense of overt seriousness and vulnerability, may draw our attention and provoke our anger. However, it is essential to remember that behind their behavior lies a facade of self-protection. These individuals have developed a survival mechanism that shields them from having to confront their own insecurities. Pause for a moment and acknowledge that, at one point, we may have played the same role in our own lives.

3. Cultivating Empathy and Compassion:

Forgiveness is rooted in empathy and compassion. Put yourself in the shoes of the person who has wounded you, seeking to understand their journey and the circumstances that shaped their behavior. Remember that everyone is fighting their own battles and that their actions might be a manifestation of their pain. By cultivating empathy, we plant seeds of forgiveness in our hearts.

4. The Liberation of Forgiveness:

Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength. Liberating ourselves from the burden of anger and resentment allows us to reclaim our inner peace and emotional well-being. Understand that forgiving others does not condone their actions; rather, it frees us from the chains that tie us to the past. Embrace forgiveness as a transformative tool for personal growth and healing.

Conclusion:

The journey towards forgiveness is a profound and liberating one. As we reflect on our own judgments, understand the nature of prickly individuals, and cultivate empathy and compassion, we pave the way for forgiveness to manifest in our lives. By embracing forgiveness, we shed the weight of anger, freeing ourselves to live a life of peace and joy. Remember, forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves, allowing us to heal, grow, and embrace the transformative power of compassion. Start your journey of forgiveness today and embark on a path towards liberation and emotional well-being.

Revelations

The Power of Embracing Pain: A Journey Towards Healing

Reba Nietert

Copyright 2012 – Rebecca Nietert

In a world where pain often feels like an unbearable burden, we discover fascinating mechanisms to shield ourselves from its grasp. For years, I developed a coping mechanism—a way to shut my eyes, tell myself to forget, and bury the pain deep within. This ability seemed almost magical, allowing me to process emotions faster than those around me. However, as time went on, I realized that my avoidance of pain was not a sign of strength, but rather a fear that held me captive. Join me on a journey towards embracing our pain, discovering the true strength within, and finding healing in unexpected places.

1. The Illusion of Strength: The Art of Suppression

To the outside world, my ability to swiftly move past painful experiences made me appear stronger than I truly felt. However, deep down, I knew that suppressing pain was not the same as overcoming it. In fact, my avoidance only perpetuated its existence, leaving behind unresolved emotions that festered beneath the surface. By acknowledging the illusory nature of this facade, we can begin to unravel the truth about strength and resilience.

2. The Power of Vulnerability: Breaking Free from Fear

Fear holds us prisoner, preventing us from confronting our pain and inhibiting our emotional and spiritual growth. By allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, to acknowledge and feel the depths of our pain, we open a gateway to finding true healing. It’s important to embrace the uncomfortable, for it is within vulnerability that we discover our strength and resilience.

3. The Healing Path: Embracing Pain as a Catalyst for Growth

Rather than avoiding pain, we can view it as a transformative force that leads us towards personal growth and healing. Through therapy and self-reflection, I gradually learned that healing cannot occur in the absence of pain; it is through embracing and processing our pain that we gain invaluable insights and develop newfound resilience. It is in the darkest moments that we discover our capacity to rise above adversity.

4. The Courage to Forgive: A Journey Towards Liberation

In our quest for healing, forgiveness plays a crucial role. However, forgiveness is not about denying the pain or excusing the actions that caused it; it is about releasing ourselves from the burdens of resentment and allowing ourselves to move forward. By embracing the vulnerability to forgive, we free ourselves from the clutches of pain, finding liberation and inner peace.

5. The Beauty of Resilience: Empowering Ourselves with Compassion

Through the process of embracing pain, we cultivate resilience—an inner strength that allows us to navigate the complexities of life with grace and compassion. Resilience is not about shutting ourselves off from pain, but about acknowledging its existence, learning from it, and using our experiences to empathize with others on their journeys.

Conclusion:

While the world may perceive our ability to process pain quickly as strength, true strength lies in our willingness to face it head-on. The journey towards healing requires us to embrace our pain, be vulnerable, and forgive. By exploring the depths of our emotions and finding the courage to heal, we unravel the transformative power within, paving the way for growth, resilience, and a profound understanding of ourselves and others. Remember, in our collective journey towards embracing pain, we discover the true essence of strength and the unimaginable beauty of healing.